


Echo

by TangentialMango



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: A Stitch in Time - Andrew Robinson, Bargaining, F/M, Introspection, Tension, the value of family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-19
Updated: 2015-04-19
Packaged: 2018-03-24 16:24:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3775375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TangentialMango/pseuds/TangentialMango
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>How Mila Garak ended up hidden in plain sight.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Echo

**Author's Note:**

> This is set before A Stitch in Time, though it’s been a little while since I read it. My first work, so I welcome all feedback.

Iriya Garak embraced her parents and sister in quick succession before they all settled at the kitchen table. It was to be a short visit, and bittersweet at that. They hadn’t seen each other in some time, and this meeting was deemed necessary due to the arrest of her brother Tolan. The local law enforcement had taken it upon themselves to root out a gathering of Oralian Way followers and arrested the lot of them.

Iriya normally wouldn't give a second thought to the arrest of Oralians; after all, she had no love of superstition and distraction. But if a person spent five minutes with Tolan, they’d know his rhetoric was no threat to anyone. She’d certainly put up with it for years and he hadn’t managed to change her mind about anything. He’d held onto this folly beyond his formative years when one might expect this sort of thing, but he wasn’t some radical dissident trying to upend society. Not that it would matter.

It was safe to assume that he’d serve in a labor camp for a year or so (it was a lesser, first-time infraction), but the real problems would come when he was finally released. He’d find himself shut out of social events and ignored by those with whom he was previously on speaking terms. When seeking employment, an astonishing number of jobs will have just been filled yesterday. So long as he stayed in the close-knit resort town their family called home, he’d have no livelihood.

So when news reached Iriya that he’d been arrested, she’d sought help to secure his future. She couldn't let him languish, wasting his life away. Even more than that, she couldn't allow him to burden the rest of the family. Her parents had worked long hours for decades on end; they should be able to retire soon. Her younger sister Nerin's sharp mind had earned her a spot on a research team studying ecological changes in the nearby rainforest, and there was talk of a position with the science ministry after she completed her studies. Tolan's foolishness put it all in jeopardy. Even if they weren't judged too harshly for associating with a convicted heathen, the family resources would be stretched thin.

"I've discussed Tolan's situation with my employer, and he's arranged a job for Tolan in the capital after he's released."

Their collective reaction was palpable, as though they’d been holding their breath this whole time.

After a moment, her mother broke the silence. "What will he be doing?"

"He'll be a maintenance foreman in charge of groundskeeping in the Tarlak sector."

Her father breathed out an incredulous laugh. "He gets arrested and somehow gets a promotion."

“And what did _you_ have to do to get this job for him?” Nerin’s raised eyeridge and mocking smirk captured the entirety of their sibling rivalry in a single expression. Iriya shot her an annoyed smile -yes yes, you’ve never made _that_ joke before- while suppressing the anxiety that threatened to rise up in her.

“I’ve told you before, my employer has a few strings he can pull when the mood strikes him. I explained Tolan’s situation, and he graciously decided to call in a favor on our behalf. The only thing I’ll be doing in return is running some extra errands and working overtime without pay. And of course, Tolan will have to stop associating with the Oralian Way.” She waved her hand dismissively, shooing some invisible insect from her face. “He made it clear that this would be Tolan’s singular chance.”

“Will Tolan-”

“I already spoke to him about it at the detention facility, he understands. Just between the four of us, I don’t think he’ll ever give it up, but he knows that his future hinges on his keeping his religion to himself. He’s on board with the arrangement.”

 

<<<

 

“This plan is insane!” Tolan’s emphatic whisper was barely audible over the high-pitched whine of the jamming device in her pocket.

“It’s not as though there’s any real choice here.”

Yes there is, Iri. If this is the price you have to pay, it’s not worth it. I’ll live with the discomfort of my reputation.”

“You know it’s not as simple as that Tolan.” She had hoped this conversation would be easier. The noise from the jamming device was clouding her thoughts; it was difficult to explain without telling too much. “Would you really rather go back to Ba’aten? You’d rather squander your potential and lean on the rest of us?

“I’m not sure how to weigh that against pretending to be enjoined to my sister!” He was still whispering but the words came out so fast they sounded more like a hiss of escaping air than a coherent sentence. Tolan’s eyes glanced at the door and the guard posted just outside. Still oblivious, still safe. “He’s using you - using us - to launder his illegitimate child.” His indignation matched his disbelief that this statement could describe a real situation, let alone one he found himself in.

She breathed out slowly. “Did it ever occur to you that I have my own reasons for participating this plan?” She didn’t meet his eyes. It was the sort of statement that allowed him to fill in the blanks on his own while she kept the details to herself.

Sure enough, the tone of his voice shifted slightly. “It’s him, isn’t it? There’s something going on between you two, isn’t there?”

The electronic whine wound on, ringing in her ears. “Something,” she replied.

 

<<<

 

A slow smile crept across Tain’s face.

She felt her blood pressure rise. “I fail to see what you find so amusing about this situation.” She was in no mood to play games.

Laughing under his breath, he stood up from his chair and poured himself a drink from the nearby liquor cabinet. “Do you remember that conversation we had two years ago after the incident on the Klingon freighter? You had snooped through some of my files, and discovered that the burns I’d suffered didn’t come from a plasma conduit explosion, but from a phaser. And after reading through the entirety of my official reprimand, you’d told me that I only had myself to blame,” his tone turned to gentle mocking. “That I’d been brash, seeking grandeur, glory, infamy. You said that I couldn't afford to be remembered so long as I worked for the Order.”

He paused long enough to savor a sip. "You were right of course. I was being careless in my vanity. But I could not get your rebukes out of my head. Is it wrong to want to be remembered? Is it so terrible to desire some assurance that you won't be forgotten? My carelessness was unforgivable, but if a simple desire to carve out a place in history is vanity, then I am very vain indeed."

"A conclusion I reached some time ago.” She couldn’t resist the opening for a jab. “I'm still waiting to see how this connects to Tolan."

"The fact of the matter is, I've assumed that the simplest and most common method of creating a legacy is beyond my reach because of my profession. I cannot enter into an enjoinment or have a family. Relationships will always be used against me by my enemies. However, it seems that my assumption was premature." He downed the rest of the drink and the glass aside, "My legacy could be carried on by a descendant, a child brought up in my image to persist after I’m gone. Your brother's indiscretion presents both of us with the unique opportunity to continue our family lines while keeping any connection to me concealed."

She dropped her chin and pinched the bridge of her nose, "I’m sorry, it sounds like you’re asking me to have a child with you."

"More or less. Your brother needs a fresh start. I can set him up with a new job in this prosperous city. He will, of course, see the error of his ways and drop this Oralian Way nonsense. It wouldn't be too surprising that amidst this reform he meets a nice girl, settles down and starts a family."

She blinked hard at him, "I think it would raise a few red flags if siblings were to apply for an enjoinment license."

"It would do no such thing because Iriya Garak would be dead. I can stage a transporter accident, you'd disappear and only a trace of your DNA would turn up at the intended destination. No one would question it. It's the sort of tragedy that occasionally happens with a minor power interruption. Meanwhile, you'd safely arrive at a different location."

Thoughts raced, seeing how this could all come together. "And no one will recognize me because..."

"Complete facial reconstruction to compliment your new identity."

She leaned on the arm of the chair, cradling her chin in her hand. Turning over everything he’d just explained in her mind, she began weighing loss against gain. If she’d been asked what she’d do for Tolan ten minutes ago, she’d have said “anything” without hesitation, but this idea was beyond what she could have predicted and required serious consideration.

"Give me a night to think about this."

"Of course, take all the time you need." He crossed the room, removed a book from the shelf, and settled with it, unphased. She took her leave and headed to her basement quarters on the other side of the house.

She had to laugh at herself: out of the many, many aspects to be reviewed, the first issue that sprang to her mind was the discomfort of sharing a room with her brother, as if that problem deserved the most attention. Oh well, old habits died hard. Growing up, their family’s home was cramped and the three of them had always fought over space. She supposed that they could come up with some arrangement that was manageable; it shouldn’t be too difficult. She was determined to get the bed though. Tolan could have a futon or something.

As she changed out of her work clothes, the real problems began to surface. There would be no going back to Ba’aten, no seeing her old friends, and all contact with her family would have to be kept to an absolute minimum. Tolan would still be able to see them a little more often, but she had no experience working undercover. There was too high of a chance they’d recognize something in her walk, her mannerisms, the cadence of her speech. What little time she did spend with them would be markedly different. She could do this...but it was, by far, the most distressing aspect of the arrangement. She covered her mouth with her hand.

Her mouth. Her face. She felt it, consciously felt it for the first time, tracing all its ridges and contours. She had no idea where to start with the concept of disguising her face for the rest of her life. It’s not as though the possibility of becoming completely unrecognizable was a normal, everyday thought.

She dropped down on her bed with little ceremony, and cleared her mind of all thought for a minute or two. Getting upset right now wouldn’t help her come to any conclusions. For all Tain said about “taking as much time as she needed,” they both knew that they had to act quickly if Tolan was to be helped.

A few deep breaths, and she had reoriented her thoughts away from the more distressing ideas. There were gains to be had, strange as it seemed in contrast. She laid back, eyes on the bare ceiling.

Becoming a mother was an option she'd written off for some time. It was a simple matter of give and take. She'd wormed her way into doing minor work for the Order. If she wished to continue doing so, it was only prudent to minimize attachment. She’d decreased contact with her existing family members, feigning an overly busy schedule. Getting close enough to anyone to consider enjoinment simply seemed foolish, and if enjoinment was off the table then having children certainly was as well.

This was a decision she was at ease with. It wasn't as if she had had someone special in her life. No, her work for the Order was more fulfilling than any other relationship she'd been in. Her role was small, confined to operating within Tain's house alone. She was a housekeeper who happened to keep a very unusual house. Recording while conversing and observing, forging while filing, laundering evidence in the weekly wash. Things occasionally got more exciting when Tain needed assistance with some halfwit he’d lured to the house to blackmail or interrogate, but by and large she operated on the periphery.

And she relished every moment of it. From a young age, she had assumed that, belonging to the service class, her work was destined to be self-contained. But now, her work had far reaching consequences that she herself could witness as easily as watching the trial broadcasts. Like a drop hitting the smooth surface of water, her actions rippled outward and helped bring corrupt radicals to justice and protect interests abroad.

So long as Tain lived, so long as this house stood, her path was clear. There was no uncertainty in this. This curious occupation had given her life a meaning she never could have anticipated, and she would cling to that at the expense of all else.

And yet, a child.

When she stripped away all the complexities surrounding her situation, she couldn’t deny that she very much desired a child of her own. Her satisfaction with her chosen path in life didn't stop the occasional daydream. It didn't stop the twinge of jealousy she felt on her trips home when she ran into old classmates with their little ones in tow. It didn’t stop the reflected joy she felt when she passed the park full of happy children on her trips to the market. In her life, family wasn't "All" in the most absolute sense of the phrase, but the wish to create her own family was unmistakable.

What of the risks? Having a child and what appeared to be a husband was still a possible weak point be exploited. It was true that she kept a low-profile, and that she was unlikely to be targeted. Even with those low odds, it had never seemed worth it when this theoretical family could be kidnapped and used as leverage or when she herself could be killed in the line of duty. But now her desire to protect her brother was added into the equation and the balance was shifting.

And then there was the fact that, where she was currently afforded only minimal security as befitted her rank with the Order, Tain would never allow a child that was secretly his to remain so unguarded. He didn't survive this long by being lax about defenses. She'd have to inquire about what steps he planned to take and make sure all protections and precautions not only covered her and the child, but Tolan as well.

She rolled on to her side so that she could peer out her ground-level window. Light was shining from the window of the study across the inner courtyard. It seemed that Tain was continuing to read.

She couldn’t remember whether she or Tain had taken the first step to turn a working relationship into something decidedly more physical. A passing attraction had solidified its presence with their barbed repartee. It didn't hurt that she had been lonely and bored, only knowing a handful of people after moving to a new city. Looking back, she would say he probably was too, though he was isolated by his profession more than his circumstances.

As she dug deeper into the things he tried so hard to hide, as she involved herself more and more with operating in the shadows, they'd somehow arrived at a certain level of trust. For her part, she might have even admitted to a small amount of affection for him.

But she wasn’t a fool. Tain’s influence in this child's life would be...questionable. The strange emphasis in his voice when he'd said the child would be raised "in his image" was troubling. What would that entail, and how would he go about achieving it? He could never be involved directly in the daily minutiae of raising his heir. That would draw far too much attention. Tain could, however, open the door to possibilities that only someone of his status had access to; that would be his greatest contribution as far as she was concerned. He was welcome to whatever else he could accomplish in the fleeting moments he was able to interact with his child, but the rest of the time she’d raise him or her as she saw fit.

Of course, she’d have to frame her ultimatum in terms he would understand.

And with that thought, she realized that her mind was made up.

The next morning, she met Tain in the study. He was sitting in the same chair with a book as if he hadn’t moved all night. Perhaps he hadn’t. “Good morning Iriya, I trust you slept well.”

She ignored the pleasantry and jumped right in without bothering to sit down.

“I haven’t missed the fact that you’re asking me to disappear so that some part of you can persist forever.” If he was surprised by her candor, it didn’t show. “It’s certainly not a fair deal. However, I am willing to do it so long as the child can be equally mine. I also want to pass something on, especially if the woman everyone knows as Iriya is dead. And frankly, if my choice is merely between toiling away for decades trying to craft a perfect replica of you or leaving Tolan to his fate, then I suppose Tolan will have to suffer. There are other ways I’d like to spend my time.”

He eyed her shrewdly. If he doubted her motives for demanding her part in the child’s life, she couldn’t see it. After a moment, he stood and began pacing. “I think that should be acceptable, as long as we agree on a few terms. The first being that I shall still have a presence in the child’s life when it is prudent. I will of course, be discrete. If suspicions are raised, this whole plan would come crashing down around us.”

“Naturally.”

“Second, he -it will be a ‘he’ by the way, that will be arranged-” here she nodded indifferently, “will attend the finest educational institutions I can arrange, and will pursue a career in the Obsidian Order.”

The shortest laugh escaped her. She couldn’t help letting sarcasm take over, “No, I think he’d be better off living in an alleyway eating voles to survive. Come on Tain, what do you think I’m doing this for? It’s certainly not because I hope the child will inherit your stunning physique.”

“How odd. You’ve become intimately acquainted with my appearance, yet you only now voice your disapproval.”

“I’ve also kept quiet about the fact that I have poor taste.” With a resolution approaching, their usual banter was seeping back in.

HIs eyes narrowed but his smile didn’t budge. “Finally, Tolan cannot be allowed to pollute his mind with any of this Hebitian nonsense. I’m sure you and I can both agree that it has no place in our child’s life. The question is, can you keep Tolan’s religious zeal reigned in?”

At this, she grasped his hand in solidarity. “Consider it done.”

 

>>>

 

“If I was going to stop, I’d have done so long before now.”

Tolan was jumping to conclusions. Perhaps the noise of the jamming device was ringing in his ears as much as her own. “You've made your commitment to this outdated practice abundantly clear, but I wasn't saying you had give it up completely. What you need to do is keep it to yourself. Stop going to gatherings. If you’re arrested a second time, the whole point of moving you to the capital to start over will have been for nothing. More importantly though, if he thinks you’re trying to convert his son, things could get unpleasant. And I’ll be none too happy with you either,” she added as an afterthought.

His gaze remained firmly on the table as he spoke, “You’ve always managed to get yourself through complicated situations just fine, even when we were kids, but I think you might be in over your head with this one.”

She circled around the table to his side and crouched so she was at eye level, placing a comforting hand on his upper back. “You know what the difference is between your situation and mine? We know you’re in over your head. We know what sort of life you're going to lead if we don't do something.” Her tone was firm but not wholly unkind. “Yes, there is the risk that things might go wrong with this plan, but there's also the chance that things could turn out alright. When comparing the two options, I'll take the one that still offers possibilities."

He leaned in his chair letting his head fall back. Long minutes passed as he thought through the fine details of it all, just as she had done not so long ago. Eventually, he turned to her. "So this is the last time I'll see you? As you are, I mean?"

Relief tinged with a hint of sadness swept over her as she nodded slowly. The moment was interrupted by a loud bang on the door and the muffled voice of the guard shouting "Five minutes!"

Turning back, she whispered "You'll be sentenced to eighteen months in a labor camp, but you’ll be suddenly released four months early. I'll come meet you. You'll know it's me." She indicated to him that she was deactivating the jamming device. Expecting relief, she was disappointed that the ringing in her ears continued.

They both stood and hugged one another.

"Goodbye, Iri."

"I'll see you soon, Tolan."

 

>>>

 

"We'll see you soon enough though. When did you say Tolan’s hearing would be?"

“It’s supposed to be in two weeks, but it may get moved. We should have a confirmation in a few days.” In truth, the date had been set for some time now, but she felt compelled to let some probable uncertainty linger.

She walked with her family back to the transporter station in the intense sunlight. It was a gorgeous day. Happy travelers were passing them in the opposite direction, headed to the beach or their hotels. In between the buildings off to her left the gentle waves of the sea flashed, nearly blinding if one stared for too long. Past the commercial and residential areas on her right, the ever-present rainforest loomed in the distance. She was immensely thankful that her final memory of this place would be one of perfection, and her mind frantically inscribed every detail.

Her father was talking now, catching her up on local news. The local Archon had landed himself in hot water and somehow this related to a recent spike in energy costs. She wasn’t really listening so much as she was mentally preserving the lilt of her father’s voice. Nerin gave out her opinion on the matter enthusiastically, gesturing wildly as she tended to do. Her mother offered no new insights, but voiced her agreement as they moved along.

Much too soon they arrived at the station. She held each of them close in turn and stepped up to the platform. She steadied her breath and willed the lump in her throat to stay put while her face showed only the emotion of an everyday sort of goodbye. The orange lights flitted before her eyes.

_This will be worth it. It has to all be worth it._

  
Molecule by molecule, Iriya Garak was unmade.


End file.
